Hang The Bastard!!
I arrived home the other day and noticed that I had a piece of mail waiting for me that was sent from the government. Oh shit.
Well it wasn't bad news at all, in fact it was an order to appear for jury duty. I don't understand how I can live in Canada for over 27 years and never hear from the court system yet after only one year in the States I get called for jury duty. I instantly pictured myself showing up at the jury selection and screaming out, "Hang The Bastard!" just to try and get out of having to do it..... but then Julie pointed out that my employer has to pay my full wages while I do my jury duty. Really? This whole process is new to me so I had no idea I would still get paid while sending some sucker to the chair..... cool! (Do those things come with dimmer switches??) Now I really wanted to do serve my adopted country and do my civic duty. I wanted to sit in the jury box while chanting out "Na, Na, Na, Na, Hey, Hey, Heyyyyyyyy Goodbye!!" or perhaps sell my vote to the defendants lawyer for a few thousand dollars.... and a new Dodge Magnum! (Man, they are sweet!).
But, as always my plans failed once again. On the sheet they list a whole crap load of reasons why you might want to turn down jury duty or reasons why you might not be eligible. I fell under the section of "I'm not a U.S. citizen therefore nobody gives a rats ass what my opinion is".
This sucks.
Well it wasn't bad news at all, in fact it was an order to appear for jury duty. I don't understand how I can live in Canada for over 27 years and never hear from the court system yet after only one year in the States I get called for jury duty. I instantly pictured myself showing up at the jury selection and screaming out, "Hang The Bastard!" just to try and get out of having to do it..... but then Julie pointed out that my employer has to pay my full wages while I do my jury duty. Really? This whole process is new to me so I had no idea I would still get paid while sending some sucker to the chair..... cool! (Do those things come with dimmer switches??) Now I really wanted to do serve my adopted country and do my civic duty. I wanted to sit in the jury box while chanting out "Na, Na, Na, Na, Hey, Hey, Heyyyyyyyy Goodbye!!" or perhaps sell my vote to the defendants lawyer for a few thousand dollars.... and a new Dodge Magnum! (Man, they are sweet!).
But, as always my plans failed once again. On the sheet they list a whole crap load of reasons why you might want to turn down jury duty or reasons why you might not be eligible. I fell under the section of "I'm not a U.S. citizen therefore nobody gives a rats ass what my opinion is".
This sucks.
3 Comments:
Maybe better luck? next time - it is quite gut-churning to decide the fate of another human being. If you get another opportunity, try it...it gives an education of the legal system.
Rollerhead
GET OUT! You get your full wages when you are on jury duty? Are you sure? I don't think ALL companies do that...not here in...uh...Canada anyways. Govn't only pays something ridiculous like $20/day too. Anyways....
You make me even more confident in our legal system . . .
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